A woman and a minister are in an elevator together. After the doors close, the woman turns to the minister and says "won't you make me feel like a true woman?" So the minister takes off all of his clothes and says "Now fold those."

I guess it's about time to write something in here again. I've been rebelling against blogging since all I ever hear about anymore in myspace. I think everyone in the world is on there now. Blah.

So what's new... Actually got a promotion at work. Merch manager of womens and kids. Win the battle, lose the war... Adam got me an interview at Saks, and it was tempting, but don't really think it's for me. I think the whole Boston thing was the main seller, but it's a bit out of reach.

Was on vacation a couple of weeks ago, but it was a bust. Dad was in the hospital most of it and I was completely broke due to several mechanical needs of my car. For my birthday, Nat and Luis took me to Applebees. Everyone's broke, so it wasn't too much of a celebration. But who would ever turn down balloons, singing waiters and free food?

Martha just came back from Europe, uber jealous of her. She had a fabulous time and we're all glad to have her back.

Actually, now that I think about it, the real highlight of my vacation was catching up with the Sopranos, which I'm now totally addicted to. Unfortunately, no one else seems to watch it, so I just bore everyone with details of Tony waking up from his coma and AJ saying he's going to kill Uncle Junior.

Outside of work, I feel totally isolated from the world. I think I have spring fever. I feel like getting off my butt and meeting some new boys. The problem being is I can't quite figure out where the cute, mature, interesting, smart ones hind. Maybe everyone has that problem....

So.
Haven't written anything on here in like months.
Merry Christmas, happy stuff to you.
Doesn't really feel like there's anything exciting to report. Feels like i'm at work all the time, but the fact i seem to only hang out with people from work only adds to that. Went to boston not long ago with nathalia and luis. That was fun. went to adam's party, also fun. brought john as my date. going on ten day vacation as of next friday. don't really have any plans. i'd like to go to montreal, but we'll see.
i've been reading jonathan franzen's first book for about a week now. it's really good, but a little boring. seems a bit contradicting. I have to find him in NY so i can marry him for being so goddamned amazing. i finally read his second book, strong motion, which was really good up until the last 20 pages, but i'll forgive that because the rest was soooo good. not as good as the corrections, but still. if anyone is looking for a new author, there ya go.

well, i'd write more,b ut i'm suddenly really exhausted.

i was finally social tonight, which was great.

jess and i went down to bng and chilled for a bit over some hot beverages. then we saw the constant gardener. i didn't really enjoy it. i don't think the style of the film really fit the plot. but that's just me.

we're going to go to boston on friday, which is exciting. possibly going to meet up with an old friend that we've never actually met. trippy.

i'm not sure i want to work tomorrow. i'm afraid of being around mark. i'm afraid i'll say something really mean. and i can't stand to see boys cry.

the stickup is on. it's a pretty stupid movie, but it's during james spader's awesome hair phase (which he's still in now, but in the early part of this decade, he was much slimmer and that helps).

i think i should go to bed soon so i don't sleep forever tomorrow.

i went to boston saturday. adam never answered his phone, so i hung out by myself, which was fine. i did well at navigating and not getting mugged. i think the most enjoyable part of the day was sitting in the public gardens and reading more of how to be alone. i'm in love with jonathan franzen. so i got home, finished my book, watched a movie, went to barnes and noble to buy a new book, and then went to bed. work has been work. today i had perhaps the most awkward conversation of my life, more of a lecture, which i don't even like getting into the details of on here, even though i doubt anyone reads this anymore. anyway, so i'm mostly pissed. before the manager meeting today, i treated myself to some olive garden. it wasn't particularly delicious, but it was better than mcdonalds.

i need a change. i've been saying this for so long i sound like a broken record. it's all i think about. that i'm done with this part of my life, it's time to move on. i spent a good deal of time ranting into a paper journal the other night, which was probably the first time i've written down any personal thoughs onto paper in probably at least a year. i was watching benny and joon, after having finished sex, lies, and videotape and was feeling a bit depressed. but my main point was that i have no one to blame for where i am and what i'm doing, just myself. the fact i haven't done anything to change this is my fault too. i'm just waiting for someone else to do it, and at this rate, i'll be at polo, living at home when i'm 50.

anyway. i watched amelie last night. i love that movie. and today i bought the soundtrack to once upon a time in mexico. soooo sassy. then it was on tv when i got home, amazing. why is johnny depp so wonderful in everything he does?

So.

boston legal is back on. and james spader obsession is back on too. SOOOOO hot. I don't understand it myself. oh well.

i helped adam and evan move into boston saturday after work. i didn't realize until we were on the road that they had no idea how to get to their new appartment. fortunately i have contacts. or, a contact. i called john and got amazing directions; if it weren't for him, i'd probably still be there, lost in china town or something. after i helped the boys unload my overstuffed car and took a peek into their little world, i went to visit john and to thank him for saving my life (or at least saving me from tons of hassles). we drank some bubbly and had a nice reunion. made fun of him for his approaching birthday, but it was hard to be serious. he's been running four miles a day and eating ridiculous meals, like a bowl full of lettuce and therefore in Amazing shape. totally not fair. anyway. finally got him drunk, which was fairly amusing. i had to work sunday at 7, which really sucked. had to get up at 5:30, made john make me a coffee in the dark in his adorable french press.

saturday i'm going to visit adam, which should be nice. sunday is my dad's birthday. monday is jess's last day of work, so we're going to celebrate. this gives me a lovely excuse not to help out with inventory at work, which is going to be amazingly sucky. the stockroom looks like a bomb went off. we haven't prepared at all, and mark is in charge, and he's not really organized or efficient. so i don't want to be there. and saying that my best friend is having a good bye party before leaving for cali (which isn't really true, but close enough) seems like a reasonable excuse. besides, i've helped out with every inventory for the past 4 years. i think i deserve a break.

hm, is there anything else going on? probably not. i've been reading like crazy. I bought How to be Alone and it's got wonderfully intellegent essays in it. it makes me wish i could write. or had anything i felt like writing about.

I think i've decided that it's true, that you always want what you can't have. for instance, this random semi-infatuation i have with john again since seeing him (which is compounded by the fact that he looks fucking hot). i know rationally that i have no romantic feelings for him, but that doesn't seem to change my early 20something hormones. contrasting with this is how mark is totally wrapped around my finger and i don't even want anything to do with him. i could probably get him to do anything for me at this point, but the more spineless and whimpy and subserviant he acts, the less i respect him and want to have anything to do with him. in fact, i think that if i didn't work with him and have to see him on a regular basis and be professional, i'd probably be out and out bitchy to him. i mean, i already am a bit of a bitch to him, but i think i'd be plain cruel. I'm at the point where i don't think he deserves my kindness. and that's that.

so i think i might snack on something and finish the current essay i'm reading and then make a fairly early night of it.

tomorrow is going to suck. i've had a horrible tummy ache tonight and haven't been able to go to bed as a result. but i was watching the weirdest british movie. it was decent and had a cute british dorky guy.

i've always had an ideal in my head for whom i believe i will fall in love with. it sounds horribly stupid, but it's true. and no one has ever come close to it. and i just forget about it, because it seems stupid and you don't really know who you're going to love. but maybe that's not true. maybe we do all know who's right for us and we just settle. and i don't want to settle. and i also don't want to work in 5 hours.

i think i want to go to boston more.

i'm a little sleepy and all i came home with was two extra subway tokens. i think that must be a first.

it was incredibly good though. i've thoroughly enjoyed my vacation. it is going to be enormously difficult to get my ass back to work in two days....

i'm mostly just too drunk to try to go to bed. i know because i already tried. i've drank too much so far this vacation. i haven't really drank that much over the past few days, i've just had too much tonight. i went to mc's and then the inside out club tonight with jess, adam, and evan. the fact i'm having so much difficulity typing is really telling to me. but it was fun. tomorrow, jess and i are supposed to go to boston. that sounds like a lot of fun to me. i'm supposed to pick her up at 11. i hope i wake up in time. i hope i can go to sleep in time. i really want to go to boston.

i'm having problems with mark lately. i don't really want to get in to it until i'm sober and can type a little bit faster. so yeah.

that's my vacation so far...

blah
i'm on vacation finally. yay.

today was my first day. i did my best to do nothing. i didn't get up until after 2, which is still pretty late even when you consider that i didn't go to bed until 3:30 in the morning.

i've been so miserable at polo lately. i think it's a combination of a lot of things. everything's always the same. except now i have nothing to do. just whatever sue or lindsay ask me to do, which is dreadfully boring. the best i felt all week was when i merchandised things my own way without asking anyone and it looking much better than when i did the project for lindsey. but whatever. i feel so useless.

last night i went to portland for the first time in forever. i hung out with colin and went to the ale house, portland's "#1 dive bar". it had swings at the bar, which was it's only selling point really. after, i went to bickford's to meet mark after he got out of polo. i've been to bickford's four times in one week. it's really sucky that he's working till 1am all month, the only time we see each other is late at night. so gay.

i watched the end of pumpkin today. i mostly just love this song in it at the end. i need to find a new book to read. i read lunar park by brett easton ellis last week. it was quite good. i think next i'm going to reread choke, if i can find it.

so my tummy hurts tonight. woe is me.

adam is coming home tomorrow, after losing everything he owns. saks is going to transfer him to boston, which is cool. i guess he'll be around for a couple of weeks until he gets an appartment and all of that.

my goal is to go somewhere further than portsmouth while on vacation. and to not step foot inside polo. i think i can manage it.